Friday, September 23, 2011

An Unforeseen Turn of Events!

This conversation was submitted to us by a close friend who has dealt with enough creepers in her day to be able to handle even the most blatant advances. Observe:

Creeper: i think a few days in manhattan is what you need.

Her: manhattan sucks balls. sorry to burst your bubble.

Creeper: that's quite the hopeless reply. tragic.

Her: You know James Joyce would have hated it too. It's chock full of tourists and commercialism, unreasonably overpriced, and generally lackluster.

Creeper: i dont in fact know what joyce would have thought of new york, nor would it matter much. your list of complaints has some merit but is too simplistic. you could make these complaints about any world capital. Lackluster? I dont think so. i have complaints too (dirty, hard to forge deep connections with people, too many cold months...) but its still the best city in the world and always bursting with energy and fun. its not the only place to be. i'm not a manhattan provincial. but it's not a place to be dismissed so easily. anyway, i dont want to tour nyc with you. i want to keep you in my apartment as my sex slave.

Her: The last line actually caught me completely off guard and made me laugh out loud. Kudos. But, come on, an Asian girl sex slave? Isn't that getting a little old? Put some creativity in it and hit on a 6 foot blonde from Sweden for once.

Creeper: i thought to soften it up a little, maybe even add a :). but then i thought no, lets see if she likes the line as it is. there's a reason we keep demanding asian sex slaves. they are the best sex slaves. Olga just doesn't get the job done or there'd be a bigger market for her. sometimes you dont need to reinvent the wheel.



I'm actually not sure which is more unforeseen. The fact that he went from 0-CREEPTACULAR in a single line, or the fact that the two of them seem to have it it off :D

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